I want people to be more religious.
However rather than following all these “bad” religions. I want them to instead believe, that I, Jim Thio, is a prophet, and God wants everyone to pay me $1k every year.
Saying those 2 sentences will turn them into “believers.”
Then I want believers to have faith. So I don’t have to proof anything.
Then I want them to be vigilant against all heresy, namely those who do not believe the religion I have given them.
Trying to convert “believers” into non “believers” is a crime (once I got enough believers). I mean religion is not just personal conviction. I am losing $1k/year for each of those apostate here.
Then I want people not to ever have sex outside marriage. Here, marriage is defined to be a relationship between beautiful women and Jim Thio or somebody Jim Thio approved, usually after some political concession.
For some reason, I prefer to define marriage for the mass rather than letting the consenting parties decide. That should effectively make me the pimp all of hot babes.
I’ve heard how some competing religions pull this out to motivate people to die for them. I guess, if it work once, why shouldn’t it work again right?
Also I want them to stone those who have sex outside “marriage” as defined by Jim Thio.
For those who don’t get it:
Obviously this is a joke. Well not that I wouldn’t want that if I can. Who wouldn’t. But isn’t this how religions operate? The moral is actually to be more cynical toward religion. However, sigh…. This should get the point across more.